Well, at least I think I'm funny

Remember how we failed the Foccus test?  Well, we met a nice lady who helped us out with that, and now, lo these two years later, we're setting up a couples group just for upkeep and emotional health and stuff.

Yesterday I sent out an email to our other friends, the ones we don't know us quite as well as our nearest-and-dearest , inquiring if they would like to join the group (the nearest-and-dearest are either already in the couples group or I know them well enough to know not to ask them).

It's a touchy thing, inviting people you don't know so well to come to marital counseling, but luckily I have the tact and natural grace of a hippopotamus, and while writing, I cracked myself up. I hope the recipients got my humor. But if they didn't they probably wouldn't do well in the group anyway. Anyway, for your reading pleasure, and hell, if you want to join the group, here's the letter:

Hi Friends-

So... Mr. Man and I have recently set up an on-going couple's group with the infamous Anna Marie (of "Wow, you guys scored so low on your compatibility test that you'll have to see Anna Marie before we let you get married" fame).

We already have 4 other couples joining us and we have room for one more couple. So we thought of you (all). Not in a "Wow, those people really need help" way, but more of a "Those people are cool and fun and might, possibly be interested because they're.... married?" way.

So, anyhoo, here are the details:

Anna Marie and her husband, Chuck, specialize in something called "Imago" therapy. (Here's a website: http://www.gettingtheloveyouwant.com/) It's really just communication skills for couples, though I've found a lot of the stuff to be helpful in my line of work... You know, listening to someone until they're done speaking before you start to think of all reasons that they are WRONG, that sort of thing. Also, the infamous "mirroring" technique:

"When you leave your crap on the floor, it makes me want to rip out my eyeballs."
"So when I leave my stuff on the floor it makes you angry?"
"No, it makes me want to RIP OUT MY EYEBALLS!"

We're meeting out our house once a month from 3:30-5pm on Sunday afternoons.  If we're feeling wild, we could have some socializing time before or afterward (e.g., heavy drinking), but we can figure that out at the first meeting. The cost per couple is somewhere between $30 and $40 per session, which is CHEAP compared to individual sessions, but expensive if you have a perfect marriage and don't need any help. (Like us, but we're just givers, what can I say?)

Anyway, it's entirely possible that this "improving your marriage" thing isn't your bag, but if you're kinda/maybe/sorta interested, I'd be glad to answer any questions that you might have.

Let me know if you are interested and even if you're not, let's hang out in a non-therapeutic setting, soon, okay?

Blessings,

DC (& Mr. Man)

Comments

[Meredith Gould]

I think you're a riot.

Imago therapy is quite smart and helpful...especially if you don't tell lies during the exercises or to the therapist. My ex-husband and I did a lot of work but, as I later admitted to the therapist, it probably would've worked a lot better if anyone had thought to mention the slight drinking and porn addiction. Oh well!

[tim Atkinson]

Just found your post - 18 months too late. I'm the Executive Director of Imago Relationships, so I'm always interested to find out how couples groups work out.

What happened? Hope the Imago approach worked for you? Did you ever come across the couplehood programs for faith-based communities