Dirty Catholic

Festivus for the Restofus!

I'm taking a break from the Jesse Tree to share this factoid that I realized while running errands this evening:

I may be the only person on the planet who is both directing a Christmas Pageant and hosting a Hanukkah Party. 

This weekend is a big one: On the religious side, we have Our Lady of Guadalupe (the coolest Marian apparition to date), Gaudaute (pink candle!) Sunday, & Hanukkah nights 1, 2, & 3 (of 8).  On the more personal side, this weekend is also our 2nd anniversary of home ownership and the 8th anniversary of Mr. Man and me meeting for the first time (over the phone, at least). 

So have a lot to celebrate. Of course, since I've already planned 2 Christmas parties (one for each of my jobs) and still have the Pageant looming, I wasn't really feeling the Christmas thing for my own home. Hanukkah, though, is still quite novel and fun. So tonight I'm cooking my first brisket and will spend the better part of tomorrow frying up a million Latkes. 

And Mr. Man has already looked up the rules for strip dreidel. 

Bad Laws

Exodus 1:11-21

A new king came to power in Egypt who didn't know Joseph. He spoke to his people in alarm, "There are way too many of these Israelites for us to handle. We've got to do something: Let's devise a plan to contain them, lest if there's a war they should join our enemies, or just walk off and leave us."

So they organized them into work-gangs and put them to hard labor under gang-foremen. They built the storage cities Pithom and Rameses for Pharaoh. But the harder the Egyptians worked them the more children the Israelites had—children everywhere!

The Egyptians got so they couldn't stand the Israelites and treated them worse than ever, crushing them with slave labor. They made them miserable with hard labor—making bricks and mortar and back-breaking work in the fields. They piled on the work, crushing them under the cruel workload.

The king of Egypt had a talk with the two Hebrew midwives; one was named Shiphrah and the other Puah. He said, "When you deliver the Hebrew women, look at the sex of the baby. If it's a boy, kill him; if it's a girl, let her live."

But the midwives had far too much respect for God and didn't do what the king of Egypt ordered; they let the boy babies live.

The king of Egypt called in the midwives. "Why didn't you obey my orders? You've let those babies live!" The midwives answered Pharaoh, "The Hebrew women aren't like the Egyptian women; they're vigorous. Before the midwife can get there, they've already had the baby."

God was pleased with the midwives. The people continued to increase in number—a very strong people. And because the midwives honored God, God gave them families of their own.

So Pharaoh issued a general order to all his people: "Every boy that is born, drown him in the Nile. But let the girls live."

The midwives Shiprah and Puah are the unsung gentile heroes of the Exodus story. They faced an unjust law and said "no." Through their honorable actions, Moses survived and eventually saved his people from their lives of slavery.

Today we might call Shiprah and Puah "Anonymous Christians," Karl Rahner's term for non-believers who participate in God's plan. The many atheists who live a moral and conscientious lives, the Buddhists and Hindus who work for justice, even the members of our own faith who seem so beyond the pale of normal that you wonder if they are practicing a different religion; all of these people can and do participate in God's good works. They may not celebrate Christmas. They may not understand or even like Christians like you. But their actions belie a deeper love of humanity that mirrors God's own love for us.

So tonight, sing praise for Shiprah and Puah- and for all those other people out there- the known and unknown members of God's plan- whose daily cooperation and good works bring us closer to God's kingdom on earth.

Fortunate Flaws (Joseph's Shmancy Coat)

Genesis 37:1-11

This is the story of Jacob. The story continues with Joseph, seventeen years old at the time, helping out his brothers in herding the flocks. These were his half brothers actually, the sons of his father's wives Bilhah and Zilpah. And Joseph brought his father bad reports on them.

Israel (Jacob) loved Joseph more than any of his other sons because he was the child of his old age. And he made him an elaborately embroidered coat. When his brothers realized that their father loved him more than them, they grew to hate him—they wouldn't even speak to him.

Joseph had a dream. When he told it to his brothers, they hated him even more. He said, "Listen to this dream I had. We were all out in the field gathering bundles of wheat. All of a sudden my bundle stood straight up and your bundles circled around it and bowed down to mine."

His brothers said, "So! You're going to rule us? You're going to boss us around?" And they hated him more than ever because of his dreams and the way he talked.

He had another dream and told this one also to his brothers: "I dreamed another dream—the sun and moon and eleven stars bowed down to me!" 

When he told it to his father and brothers, his father reprimanded him: "What's with all this dreaming? Am I and your mother and your brothers all supposed to bow down to you?" Now his brothers were really jealous; but his father brooded over the whole business.

Everything I know about Joseph I know because Mr. Man sang it to me. He has a thing for musicals and Joseph's Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat is one of his favorites. In fact, when reading the scriptural account to me, he has a very hard time not bursting into song.

So a spoiled younger brother and a tattle-tale? Great biblical heroes we have here. You've got to wonder if Jacob regretted the indulgence with Joseph when the kid started prattling on about his big dreams. His brothers surely knew Joseph was favored. The coat and the dream business was just rubbing it in. And Joseph was so clueless- or cocky- that he just didn't care. He told dream after dream after dream about his greatness.

Jacob's dreaming- and his inability to shut up about them, already- was his gift and his flaw. With growth, our faults can also lead us to greatness.

Without the favoritism, the bragging, and the inevitable well-dump-sold-into-slavery business, Joseph would have stayed, and starved, with his family in Canaan. By the time he reunited with his family, he is wise enough not to rub it in their faces, and they were wise enough not to reject his success.

My impatience with science lead me to a life of ministry. Mr. Man's curiosity and willfulness made him an engaged and loyal husband. Over time, the things that are our flaws can transform into things of value.

What flaws of yours have become gifts?

God Hearts Rascals (Jacob's Ladder)

Genesis 28:10-19

Jacob left Beersheba and went to Haran. He came to a certain place and camped for the night since the sun had set. He took one of the stones there, set it under his head and lay down to sleep. And he dreamed: A stairway was set on the ground and it reached all the way to the sky; angels of God were going up and going down on it.

Then God was right before him, saying, "I am God, the God of Abraham your father and the God of Isaac. I'm giving the ground on which you are sleeping to you and to your descendants. Your descendants will be as the dust of the Earth; they'll stretch from west to east and from north to south. All the families of the Earth will bless themselves in you and your descendants. Yes. I'll stay with you, I'll protect you wherever you go, and I'll bring you back to this very ground. I'll stick with you until I've done everything I promised you."

Jacob woke up from his sleep. He said, "God is in this place—truly. And I didn't even know it!" He was terrified. He whispered in awe, "Incredible. Wonderful. Holy. This is God's House. This is the Gate of Heaven."

Jacob was up first thing in the morning. He took the stone he had used for his pillow and stood it up as a memorial pillar and poured oil over it. He christened the place Bethel (God's House). The name of the town had been Luz until then.

Today I went to 2 of my 3 jobs, spending at least 5 hours at each. I also made chili for 35 people, organized Christmas crafts for just as many, and spent most of my evening trying to avoid the whiniest and most annoying child I have ever met in my entire career. She really wanted to be my friend. Someone should have told her that it is a bad idea to try to befriend an introvert at the end of a long day by asking that person to do everything for you in a really, really whiny voice. Also, don't fake-gag on the chili that person spent 3 hours making.

Anyhoo, as such, I hope you will forgive the brevity of today's post. As a bonus, Mr. Man is posting a little something for your reading pleasure. (I haven't read it yet, but knowing him, it will be embarrassing.)

So here goes.

Jacob was a rascal. He was a momma's boy who stole his brother's birthright, he "accidentally" married two women, and he was kind of a whiner. All of this just goes to prove that rascals can still recognize holy places and be loved by God.

Don't believe me? Go visit your local Cathedral.

Life With a Dirty Catholic (Mr. Man's Observations, In Stereo)

Hello, dear readers.  In case you would like to enjoy a brief window into the daily experience of living with Dirty Catholic, I would like to fill you in on a recent exchange we had:

DC:  Oh man, I just read an article about how bad soda is for you!  Apparently it damages your kidneys!  I've got to quit drinking Diet Pepsi.

Me:  Good idea.

DC:  Yeah, that kidney stuff is SCARY!  And it sure explains why I can't hold my alcohol anymore!!!

Me:  . . .

Yours,

Mr. Man

Water for the Camels

Genesis 24: 12-19

Then he prayed, "O LORD, God of my master Abraham, give me success today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. May it be that when I say to a girl, 'Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,' and she says, 'Drink, and I'll water your camels too'-let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master."

Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel son of Milcah, who was the wife of Abraham's brother Nahor. The girl was very beautiful, a virgin; no man had ever lain with her. She went down to the spring, filled her jar and came up again. The servant hurried to meet her and said, "Please give me a little water from your jar." "Drink, my lord," she said, and quickly lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a drink. After she had given him a drink, she said, "I'll draw water for your camels too, until they have finished drinking."

Genesis 24, the betrothal of Isaac and Rebekah, reads as though it were written by one of your in-laws, the one who repeats the same three stories over and over and over again. First we hear the arrangement in the servant's prayer, then we hear it unfold exactly as it was in the prayer, then we listen to the servant tell about the prayer and story all over again, from the beginning.

Of course, Rebekah and her brother Laban brought it on themselves. If I saw a stranger with 10 cars hanging around a convenience store and muttering to himself, my first thought wouldn't be, "Let's get him a drink and fill up all his cars with gas!"  But Rebekah was more hospitable than I am, welcoming the stranger, watering his camels, and inviting him to stay. Then Laban- Laban and his, "Please tell us your story" business. Most people know that it is a dangerous thing to invite a chatty person to tell their story. You might still be there three weeks later.

But their unconventional kindness worked out for them. Rebekah's manic camel watering and Laban's patient listening opened new possibilities for Rebekah and somehow accomplished God's will.

As I run around this week rehearsing pageants, throwing holiday parties at work that only strangers will attend, and thinking pessimistically about the same three topics we will discuss at Christmas dinner with my in-laws, I could stand to take a lesson from Rebekah and Laban.

Sometimes it helps to feed the strangers and water all of their 15 million camels. Sometimes it helps to listen to their story. Sometimes feeding and listening is all that God is asking you to do.

The Big Promise

Genesis 15:1-4

The word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision:
  "Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward." But Abram said, "O Sovereign LORD, what can you give me since I remain childless and the one who will inherit my estate is Eliezer of Damascus?" And Abram said, "You have given me no children; so a servant in my household will be my heir."

Then the word of the LORD came to him: "This man will not be your heir, but a son coming from your own body will be your heir."  He took him outside and said, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them." Then he said to him, "So shall your offspring be."

God isn't into small gestures. God goes BIG. The promise God made to Abraham was as enormous the night sky twinkling over Abraham's head. But the promise, like most big things, was also slow.  Abraham was already 75 when he began traipsing around the desert as God asked. It wasn't until twenty four years later Abraham and Sarah finally had their son, Issac. (Of course, Abraham did have some other sons running around from his dalliances with the maids, but never you mind that.)

Nonetheless, after 24 years, I imagine that it was hard to keep trusting that God would bless him with descendants as numerous as the stars. It is hard to wait. It is hard to trust. Yet God returned again and again to encourage and cajole Abraham, to remind him of the big-sky in the promise.  Today, with the Jews, Christians, and Muslims claiming Abraham as their forefather, I think it is evident that God kept his promise. 

We, too make big promises. The promise to love, to raise, to support. These promises, like God's, are lifelong undertakings. They are promised and re-promised and promised again as the years flow by. I am a mere 3 years into the biggest promise of my life so far, my marriage. Mr. Man is a piece of work, but by no means is this promise one that is hard to keep. What is hard is remembering to be grateful for the blessing my marriage is, even as we wait- impatiently- for the new promise of children. 

Today, think about all the promises you've made. Take a chance to renew some of those promises. Like God did for Abraham time and again, remind someone you love of the promise you continue to make to them today.

God Throws in the Towel

Genesis 6:5-11

(The whole story, which I recommend, is Genesis 6:5-9:17)

"God saw that human evil was out of control. People thought evil, imagined evil—evil, evil, evil from morning to night. God was sorry that he had made the human race in the first place; it broke his heart. God said, 'I'll get rid of my ruined creation, make a clean sweep: people, animals, snakes and bugs, birds—the works. I'm sorry I made them.

But Noah was different. God liked what he saw in Noah. This is the story of Noah: Noah was a good man, a man of integrity in his community. Noah walked with God. Noah had three sons: Shem, Ham, and Japheth. As far as God was concerned, the Earth had become a sewer; there was violence everywhere. God took one look and saw how bad it was, everyone corrupt and corrupting—life itself corrupt to the core. God said to Noah, "It's all over. It's the end of the human race. The violence is everywhere; I'm making a clean sweep."

You know that one about too many cooks in the kitchen? The Noah story is a great reminder that the bible could have used a good editor. Instead we got four editors who couldn't bring themselves to actually edit. Was the flood 40 days or 150 days? Eh....put them both in! Were there 2 of each animal or 14 of each animal? Let's just put the 14 part in a few paragraphs later! 

Reading through the Hebrew scriptures can make short work of a purely literal understanding the bible. (Did anyone catch that bit at the beginning of Genesis 6 about "the Sons of heaven" getting it on with "the daughters of Man?" Dude.) In Catholic circles, we understand a lot of these stories as Mythic. Not mythic as in a silly make-believe story, but mythic how your favorite novel is Mythic. The character may not have actually existed, but her story is a true rendering of the human experience.

And that's how I'm coming at the Noah story. Was there a big ol' flood around Israel a long time ago? Probably. Did all the animals on earth fit into a boat the size of a cruise ship? Probably not.

For me, the higher level of truth- the beyond literal truth- is what I see in how God is feeling. Have you ever been so disappointed that you just wanted to give up? Maybe you've quit a job in a huff, or threatened to sell you kids to the circus. Maybe you've come home exhausted, week after week wondering if your life will ever change. 

I imagine this is how God felt. Exhausted. Disappointed. Frustrated. His beloved people were so far fallen from his hopes for them, so depraved, that he just gave up on them. He gave up. God gave up, and chaos took over.

I'm not going to turn this into some trite moral about never giving up. I think a well timed give-up can sometimes be exactly the right thing. But sometimes it's not. In this case, God seemed to regret His decision. And he makes his first big promise to all of us- never again. And with that promise, God begins a whole campaign of promises and pleas, intervention and visits throughout our history. And so far, He has not given up.

Adam Blames Eve, Eve Blame Snake, Dirty Catholic Blames Pageant

Genesis 3:8-12

When they heard the sound of God strolling in the garden in the evening breeze, the Man and his Wife hid in the trees of the garden, hid from God.  God called to the Man: "Where are you?"

He said, "I heard you in the garden and I was afraid because I was naked. And I hid." God said, "Who told you you were naked? Did you eat from that tree I told you not to eat from?" The Man said, "The Woman you gave me as a companion, she gave me fruit from the tree, and, yes, I ate it." God said to the Woman, "What is this that you've done?" "The serpent seduced me," she said, "and I ate." 

Is anyone surprised that the very first sin, after the bite, was Adam blaming something on his wife?  Maybe it's just me. I have a nickname for Mr. Man that I use from time to time and that nickname is "Blamer McBlamenstein." I use it when he accuses me of losing his key or hiding his wallet or moving his whatever-it-is to anywhere but where he thought he put it. It's a fun game.

Of course, he could make the same assertions about me. Like right about now, when you are realizing that a whole bunch of these Jesse Tree posts are dated correctly, but oddly, not showing up until a few days later? I blame the Christmas Pageant. Sometimes it's just easier to pass the buck than to admit to our own disorganization, faults, or mistakes.

And Adam and Eve made a BIG mistake. Did you catch that bit in verse 8 about "God strolling in the Garden?"  Adam and Eve lived with God. He walked about and enjoyed the Garden with them. You know, chillin' in the Garden with God, eating cherries in the warm evening breeze. Like you do.

The apple-binge changed the easy, dependent relationship humanity had with God. Instead of living with God, we became commuters. We visited God on hilltops and at burning bushes. We saw God occasionally in dreams and temples. We called out to God, God called out to us, but often, we just couldn't hear each other talking. 

And that lasted for a while, until God came back to walk among us again. Without that big mistake, we would not known what we were missing. Without that big mistake, we would not have known Jesus. A line in the Exultet, a hymn sung at the Easter vigil, sums up this idea poetically,  "O happy fault, O necessary sin of Adam, that gained for us so great a Redeemer!"  

So while we wait this Advent in eager anticipation for our Redeemer to come again, we can thank- or blame- Adam and Eve for the greatest gift we await- Jesus.

Creation

Genesis 1-2

Yes, both chapters. But for the lazy, here's a selection from The Message Translation:

"God spoke: "Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature
   So they can be responsible for the fish in the sea, the birds in the air, the cattle,
   And, yes, Earth itself, and every animal that moves on the face of Earth."
   God created human beings; he created them godlike,
   Reflecting God's nature. He created them male and female.
   God blessed them: "Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge!
   Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air,
    for every living thing that moves on the face of Earth."

 Then God said, "I've given you every sort of seed-bearing plant on Earth
   And every kind of fruit-bearing tree, given them to you for food.
   To all animals and all birds, everything that moves and breathes,
   I give whatever grows out of the ground for food."
And there it was.

 God looked over everything he had made; it was so good, so very good!
  It was evening, it was morning— The sixth day".

I know you were probably expecting Adam & Eve on the second day of the Jesse Tree. But before we jump into the people, I wanted to take a moment to honor the place where we are rooted, from which all life sprouts: our earth. There is a tendency on the search for holiness to disregard "things of this world," to focus on heaven and the beyond and the distant. That is mistake. God created this glorious place for us as a medium of our salvation. It is with our feet in the mud that we find God. It is while wading through the dirt and brush and puddles that God walks with us. 

As Christmas approaches, the gift of the earth, along with the charge to be responsible for the earth, weighs on my mind. I worry about the buying of superfluous crap, the meaningless gifts I purchase just to check people off my list. I wonder about the waste ending up in landfills and the wasted energy making things that don't really matter.

In God's charge to care for the earth we are participating in his on-going act of creation. We can choose to create with God, or to destroy with that other guy. Paying attention to all the little ways we waste God's creation, use more that our share, choose convenience over responsibility, can give us an incredible insight to how well we live up to God's charge to care for the world.

But don't get too depressed. I readily admit that the thought of being ecologically perfect is about as impossible- and depressing- as the thought of being morally perfect. So this Advent I am resolved to change one little thing. This Advent I am doing away with styrofoam cups. It seems silly, I know, but with work at a church, I can end up with entire wastebaskets full of freaking styrofoam cups at the end of an evening.  It's as small a thing as making a different choice at the grocery store. And in a little, almost invisible step, I can choose to give a gift to the earth. I can choose to be responsible for this creation that is so very good.

What is one small thing you can do this Advent to care for the earth?